While having breakfast with Stephanie today, I got a harsh reminder that I’m starting to turn out like my dad. Dont’ get me wrong, he’s not a bad person but I’ve always resented taking on his bad habits.
For example, Stephanie was talking about how bad her week went, and I couldn’t really listen or emphatize with her. She got quite angry because no one likes talking to a wall. That’s the same feeling I get when I talk to my dad, it’s like he doesn’t listen or even try to understand. All he does is come to his own conclusion and you kinda get pissed with his simplistic conclusion.
I mean, I know he’s experienced in life and all, but we all come to our own conclusions right ? All I wanna do is just be heard, or understood. And I’m so pissed that I myself cannot be understanding to the person I care for the most.
The other big gripe about my dad is that he’s too nice. I know what ya’ll are thinking, that the world needs more nice people right? Well, there is a fine line by being a nice person and being a person that people take advantage of. My dad is the latter.
So when I find myself being taken advantage of, the first person I blame is my dad. Because he’s always taught me to be kind and nice to everyone. Well, some people just don’t deserve being nice to. That’s why I have a black list of ex-friends (okay, just 3) which I dub “emotional vampires”. All they do is suck the living optimism out of you and are a pain to have around. Have any of those kinda friends around ? Well ditch them. You’ll feel better immediately.
I know it’s unfair to blame my dad about these kinda things. But I just feel he’s too soft. Maybe it’s an inherent desire to be as different from your parents as you can be? Something about evolution and genetic variation ?
As different as I want to be , the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.
He just told me recently that when he was studying in Taiwan, he had 3 girlfriends at the same time. And he was bald. Jeebus! I thought I was cool when I did those things. I’m just like my dad, after all. Well, I’m cooler cause he doesn’t have a tattoo.
Perhaps one day I’ll learn to aquire the best traits of my dad, and also learn from his mistakes. Then I’ll be the best person I can be and make peace with him after all.